January 14, 2008

When I say I don’t know football, I mean, I DON’T KNOW FOOTBALL

I never was into sports growing up. Well, except for figure skating (I had Dorothy Hamil’s haircut) and a bit of women’s tennis (does anyone ELSE remember Tracy Austin and her pigtails?). In college, when I dated a guy from Kentucky, I got sucked in to NCAA men’s basketball. I knew every single player’s name on the Wildcats team. I watched religiously, or as religiously as I could, living in the Bay Area. But when I moved to Kentucky, I was up to my eyeballs in Kentucky Basketball. And I loved it. Not only did I know the names of the players, but I knew their girlfriends’ names. I went to the games, even some SEC championship games. I screamed for the team, and I went to the airport to greet them when they returned from out-of-town. I went to Rite-Aid (or was it Drug Emporium?) to meet two of the players (Rodney Dent (did you know he was born on Christmas day?) and Gimel Martinez) and stood in line with the umpteen moms with their 10-year old sons to wait for my turn to get a picture with them. I was a fan superfan. Also, I was a geek.

But never have I been a fan of football. Not that I don’t like it, I just never cared either way. I know who Joe Montana is, and Steve Young too (and OJ, of course), and I recall the SuperBowl Shuffle by the Chicago Bears.

That is ALL I know about football.

Don’t believe me?

Here’s a snippet of a conversation I had with Matte during yesterday’s Dallas LOSS (la la la):
Me: What’s a down?
Matte: Well, when the ball is snapped and…
Me: What does snapped mean?

Seriously! I didn’t know! (But before you think I’m a moron, I can tell you what section of the ISO standard for medical devices deals with document control. Can YOU?) And despite my embarrassing lack of knowledge regarding football, I do know that I want the Packers to win this coming weekend. And then I want them to kick Patriot ass on February 3. Because, for one reason, I am a little bit in love with Brett Favre right now (meee-yow!). Also, there’s that whole National Championship title thing that comes with it, but whatever.

P.S. Matte told me to add “Lombardi’s trophy deserves to be home.” I have no idea what that means.

10 people have roominated about “When I say I don’t know football, I mean, I DON’T KNOW FOOTBALL”

  • Schnozz says:

    I deliberately never learn anything about football. If I could understand my husband, he would just talk even MORE to me about it. What kind of idiot would I be to let that happen?? Ignorance is bliss!

  • Sarah says:

    I don’t know what section deals with document control. But now I really want to know.

  • Dagny says:

    Tracy Austin was completely cute. And who didn’t want the Dorothy Hamill haircut?

    I understand football thanks to years of attending games in high school. I’m just not that interested in watching it. And Super Bowl? Well, the only purpose for that is the party. And the commercials.

  • Alison says:

    I don’t know what a down is either. But I’m right with you on Wildcats basketall!

  • Miriam D says:

    You and me both. I have no idea what anything about football means 🙂

  • Mandy Lou says:

    When I was in high school I did statistics for the football team – it was purely to meet the football players. But now I know football, and I’m sorry for it – Scott thinks he can watch it because he thinks I like it – damn.

  • Sandi says:

    When I went to my first football game in college, the program had pictures of the refs and what their signals meant. I thought they were showing different exercises. My date was horrified. But I finally learned a bit about the game while living in Denver the first time they went to the Super Bowl. Had to learn or die!

  • Kathy says:

    I’m happy with my beer and picking whatever random team I feel like for what ever random reason. Brett Favre is a good reason.

  • wi says:

    don’t worry. we will still love you. but you must appreciate how we packer crazies feel, after ky. basketball crazies. i once went to a below zero game when i had a fever. packer tickets are never given up. GO PACK!!!

  • Mark says:

    Cathie – From a fan of yours in Baltimore…I paid tribute to your blog and did my own version of your “100 Things.” Mine is not nearly so witty as yours, but my admiration for your work is as genuine as tomorrow’s Packer win, ya know?

    Best wishes in all things-


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