Early this morning, Christian Slater was arrested and charged with groping. Apparently, he touched a woman’s “buttocks.” What the hell? If he’d grabbed my ass, I’d invite him to come home with me. Was this woman Amish? It’s Christian Slater for pete’s sake!
I am hereby offering my bootie…er…buttocks for Christian to grope at will.
On this Memorial Day, I got my ass up at 5:30 and went to work out. I hadn’t been in months, and I’m sure I’ll feel it tomorrow…and the next day, and the next. It takes a lot of discipline to do this, and just getting out of the sleeping in routine is a chore. So there’s a guy there this morning, who brought his water bottle…along with his chewing tobacco. WTF? It’s like lighting up on the treadmill. Not to mention how attractive someone is with a wad of that nasty crap it in their cheek. So hot.
As a self-proclaimed pop culture junkie, I love BRAVO’s “Inside the Actor’s Studio.” At the end of each show, the host James Lipton (perfectly portrayed by Will Ferrell on SNL) asks the celebrity guest 10 questions. Because I’ll never be on that show, I’m answering them here. Enjoy, and feel free to post your answers too. It’ll be like a slam/slang book in high school.
1. What is your favorite word?
heinous
2. What is your least favorite word?
maybe
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
humor
4. What turns you off?
condescending people
5. What is your favorite curse word?
dick
6. What sound or noise do you love?
a cat’s purr
7. What sound or noise do you hate?
someone clipping their nails in their cubicle
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
screenplay writer
9. What profession would you not like to do?
funeral director
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
the Taye Diggs clones are waiting with tiramisu
I heard today that every 8 seconds, someone turns 50.
whoever that person is, they have over 10,000 birthdays every single day!